But then again, I might do this:
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
If I could be a musician, I would be a Roy Orbison impersonator. I would wear big black prescription sunglasses. I would wear them all the time, only, not to bed. Big black prescription sunglasses break in bed, silly. I would become a master impersonator. There are those that would consider me a ghost. There are others that would forget Roy Orbison is dead. After some time on the road I would take my Roy money and commission myself a time machine (I would have done this myself, but mastering Roy's mannerisms was a real eater of hours). I would then take this time machine (after the proper tests had been done to ensure its safety) and travel back to the 50's. I would do this for two reasons. One, it's what one does with a time machine, apparently, and two, I would become Roy Orbison. I would "write" and sing all his songs. I would become a hero to both country AND rock singers. I would have a brief period of obscurity. After that brief period of obscurity I would sing in a band with Bob Dylan and George Harrison and a couple of other guys who really wanted to be in a band with Roy Orbison. I would play a show with Elvis Costello and Tom Waits that would become the #1 money raiser in PBS history. I would win a Grammy and then drink Diet Coke from it. I would make my friends watch me drink Diet Coke from it. I would then say, "would anyone else like to drink Diet Coke from Roy Orbison's Grammy?" Then I would die without abusing the fact that I still owned a time machine, thus giving up the opportunity to live as Roy Orbison forever. I would do this because one lifetime as Roy Orbison should be just the right amount of time to be anything, but especially to be Roy Orbison.
But then again, I might do this:
But then again, I might do this:
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